6 Dog watching

Apparently our cat has taken to chasing dogs lately...



... this is her doing a spot of dog watching.

4 It's in God's hands

I was looking for something today, and came across this, which I wrote around this time ten years ago... And I was just thinking how true it is... It would certainly do no harm to remember He's got it all sorted, even if things don't seem to be making any sense sometimes.

It's In God's Hands

Strong and powerful, yet able to comfort
And hold tenderly. The same hands that
Created the tiny daisies and soaring eagles
Are also able to carry the weight of the world.

The one who has already planned our road ahead
Doesn't expect us to travel on our own.
On the contrary, our lives are in His hands.
Only He is in control of our destiny.

"We place our destiny in the hands of the LORD, not in the hands of men, because His mercy is as great as His majesty." (Sirach 2:18)

0 Caption Contest!

Spotted this on another blog and thought it was rather good....



As for captions, my personal favourites are:

"I once consecrated a Host thiiis big..."

"The…....hills are aliiiiiiive….. "

"He's gott da whole vorld in hiss hands.... he's gott da whole vorld in his haaands....."

... and let's not forget...



"A-le-ehhhhh-ehhy-loo-oooh-oooooh-ia!" (think Easter week...)




Any more to add?? Leave a wee comment.... :o)

4 T-shirts I really must buy...

Spotted a couple of t-shirts that I really am going to have to invest in...




And then my new personal favourite (despite the spelling mistake, hehe)....



These, and a whole bunch of others can be found over in Cafe Press...

3 Rónán Johnston - Songs of Consolation

I've just ordered my copy of Rónán Johnston's new album, Songs of Consolation, and can't wait for it to arrive. I've liked Rónán's music since I got my first Emmaus album, Come To Me, back in 1994. Emmaus' music has definitely been hugely influential in my life, as have the members of the band and community.

So anyway, I just ordered the CD and got a response within 10 minutes telling me it's all packed up and ready to go! Talk about service, hehe! Will let you know the verdict in a few days once I get a listen, but as usual when it comes to Rónán, I don't expect it to be anything less than fantastic.

You can buy it on his site at http://www.rojomusic.com

2 Easter in Jerusalem

A friend of mine, Fr T, is currently out in Jerusalem. He sent some of us this email today, describing his experiences.

Dear all,
In the absence of photos, I decided to send around a bit of circular letter here to let people know what things are like in Israel at Easter. Two of my friends, after their visit to the Holy Land in September 2005, said that the great challenge would be to not talk about it too much. So, here goes the challenge.

Easter here begins with Palm Sunday and all the Christian (i.e. Catholic) groups in the city gather in Bethphage. The geography of the city is basically that the Old City is up on the hill and next to it, facing the old Temple Mount (now the Dome of the Rock mosque) is the Kedron Valley (Jn 18:1 Remember that all hills, by definition, need valleys). Across the Kedron valley is the Mount of Olives and at the top of the Mount of Olives, just over the top of the hill is Bethphage (Mt 21:1).

The procession begins just in front of the Franciscan parish church. The Franciscans, custodians of the Catholic Holy Places in Israel, do a superb job and one thing they have done is construct apartments on the grounds of their church in Bethphage to try and encourage the dwindling Christian population to stay here, despite the difficulties of life between their Muslim neighbours and Jewish state. One of the great things about Palm Sunday is that it gives the native Christians here a day out to show off their identity with pride. Some of them come down from Galilee and some from Egypt for the day.

Exactly as for the entrance of Jesus nearly 2000 years ago, the Palm Sunday procession is still politically charged. Still, each group has brought their music and their guitars and there is a great procession of music and dancing and the biggest palms I ever did see, all the way up again to the top of the Mount of Olives and then down the route that Jesus would have taken the other side, with the Holy City facing you. The Muslims even stood by the roadside, not joining in but enjoying the party atmosphere. Then up in through the Lion Gate to the church of St. Anne, built by the Crusaders next to the "sheep pool" where Jesus cured the cripple in Jn 5. There the Patriarch, Michael Sabbah, gave the address in Arabic and English, appealing to the Palestinian Christians to love their enemies and challenge the oppressor precisely by responding with love. In the context of life here it was quite a powerful speech. Then there was a bit more dancing and then we took off to the Christian Quarter of the Old City (knocking down a dress hanging outside a shop on the way with my palm branch) to see the parade in through the city gate, with the big banner of "Jesus is Alive" or something like that on it. Scouts of French inspiration, playing Scottish bagpipes: very Palestinian!

On Holy Thursday morning a few of us went over to the Upper Room and spent a bit of silent time there reading the account of what was to take place there that evening; after the Mass of the Holy Supper here in the Dominicans, we headed down to Gethsemane, at the foot of the Mount of Olives, and sat in the garden there for a bit of silent prayer while the basilica was packed with people listening to the Passion being read in five or six different languages. Then, about 10.30, we made our way along the path from there that Jesus would have been taken after his arrest, up the Kedron Valley and then up the hill into the city, to the church of St. Peter in Gallicantu (the traditional site of the High Priest's palace, though archaeologists are quite sure now where the real site was, about 200 yards up the hill from it). The path is the same as it would have been for Jesus, but the paving stones are about 200 years after. The top of the path was lit with candles: really beautiful. Of course, it was full of people from all over who had come to meditate on what took place there that Thursday night when Jesus was arrested and hauled up those steps.

On Good Friday morning the smart people got up early and did the Via Crucis at 6 O'clock. Sorry folks, i was too tired after the night before (getting old), so joined a group at 9.30. Unfortunately, so did every other pilgrim. We got to the 2nd station and then had to turn around because of the crowd and invent our own "Via Crucis". For all that, we ended up some 40 metres from Golgotha by 11.30: right place, right time, wrong year. It can make you dizzy to come face to face with the time and place of the crucifixion of the Lord in a way like that. As my friend said, the danger is to speak too much.

Good Friday evening had the most beautiful ceremony, in my opinion. We went to the Holy Sepulchre basilica, which covers both the place of Golgotha and the tomb. The place where Jesus was crucified was originally a quarry, just outside the city walls, disused about 100 years before the crucifixion. A quarry is useful waste ground for digging tobs in the rock: hence Jesus was buried in the same place as he died, almost (Jn 19:41). Of course, having been disused for 100 years it was somewhat overgrown also, hence its desciption as a garden (Jn 21:15). The 4th century basilica of the Holy Sepulchre covers both sites: truly a wonderful place. There was a procession with psalms and antiphons from the Franciscans' sacristy to Golgotha with a crucifix. On Golgotha they remove the nails and crown of thorns from the statue of Christ. Well, I thought it was just an ordinary statue, but when they removed the nails the arms drooped down by his side and they lowered "him" down just as they would have taken someone off the cross. Essentially it was a dramatic re-enaction of the taking down from the cross. I must say, I was struck to the bone by it. Then they took Jesus down the stairs to the anointing stone and anointed the "body" with perfume and spices and then, placing him in a linen shorud, processed on to the tomb and laid him there.Then they distributed the remained of the perfume and spices. It was a really moving ceremony to see it.

On the way home I visited the fifth station on the Via Crucis to thank God on behalf of a German friend who had wanted a prayer said for all the "Simon of Cyrene"s who had helped her in her life. That was a nice prayer to say.

On Saturday the Easter Vigil takes place in the morning: because the timetable between the different Christian denominations (i.e. Greeks, Latins (us) and Armenians) was set in the 1700s it couldn't be changed after the Easter Vigil was moved from morning to night in the 1950s. But...I didn't go. One vigil is enough. Instead I made an attempt to get to the Greek ceremony of the "Sacred Fire" where the Greek Patriarch goes into the tomb of Christ and emerges with fire out of "nowhere" which is then taken around Israel and even to Greece. However, the crowds were unpassable and we were rammed by a group of Russian priests (I joke you not). Then we ended up on the roof of the Holy Sepulchre, which was useless for anything, so off we went home.

In the evening we had the vigil here in St. Stephen's (St. Stephen was buried in the Dominican church until the first Muslim takeover, when his remains were brought to Rome for safety). The fire was the highlight, caught by big winds it was blown a metre in every direction, swinging around as people tried to light the candle from it: a great symbol of the Holy Spirit.

When the Vigil was ended we went off to the Holy Sepulchre again to celebrate with the Lord, reading the Gospel there and singing our Alleluias up and down the street. On Easter Sunday morning we went to the Franciscan church right next to the Upper Room (the Upper Room isn't a church anymore, so can't say Mass there) for a wonderful Easter Mass and then called into the Benedictines to hear the Gregorian chant hymn "Resurrexi" : I am risen and am with you again, Alleluia. You placed your hand on me, Alleluia. How wonderful is this knowledge of you, Alleluia.

It was really easy to feel the delight of the Lord in Jerusalem that day. Last week we went off to Galilee for an archaeological tour. Well, the Lord really chose a beautiful part of the world for his homeland, for sure. Even today it is full of forests and fields and animals and flowers. Our house, owned by the Emmanuel Community, was overlooking the lake, so you could spend a few minutes every morning just taking it all in. We also had tours all over, including to Caesarea Philippi (Mt 16:18), Nazareth, Magdala, Tabgha (the traditional site of the multiplication of the loaves and fishes and now with a wonderful Benedictine abbey), etc. The Holy Land is really a place of great grace, coming face to face with the reality of the Lord. It's a real sign of the basic truth of our faith: it's all about Him, and He's what counts. Speaking of which, I'd better run off to say my prayers.

1 Potentially stupid idea...

OK. I've just signed up to do an abseil down the BT Tower in Belfast in aid of Marie Curie Cancer Care. And before I had time to find out how tall the building actually is and chicken out, I set up a fundraising page for people to donate online. So in other words I'm committed. Or maybe I should BE committed... Hmmm...

Anyway. While you're over there sponsoring me (hint, hint) be sure to check out the cheesy photo of me! I don't think I'll be grinning quite as much closer to the time...

3 Liturgical Anonymous

I don't know if any of you read the Curt Jester's blog... If you don't, you really should, it's hilarious! Anyway, I came across this on my travels, which really did make me 'LOL'... I've posted some parts of it below, but visit the site to read the whole thing.

Over the last century many support groups have arisen for substance abuse, alcohol abuse, and other addictions. But until now one much needed organization was missing. What about liturgiholics who abuse the liturgy? People drunk on power to change the liturgy in their parishes to their own visions divorced from liturgical history have had nowhere to turn to. That is until now.

Introducing Liturgical Anonymous (LA) an international, spiritually oriented community of liturgical abusers who meet in local groups to help each other end this destructive addiction to changing the liturgy as one wants. Liturgical Anonymous follows a 12 step program and not one of the steps are a dance step.

Once a liturgical change addict admits they have a problem they are ready for Liturgical Anonymous. My name is [Insert Name Here] and I am a liturgical abuser. Welcome you are on the road to recovery.

Many of our members also require help to throw off the vapidness of most modern liturgical music. Most find that a too rapid introduction to Gregorian Chant for instance is too much beauty to handle so quickly. Thus are program slowly weans them off of the music of Haugen-Daas with a drug equivalent of music Methadone. This drug with a high sugar content is slowly reduced over time to allow a tonal rearrangement in the subject. For priests we have a special program called "Seeing Red: Rubrics are your friends." With liturgical dancers we helped to teach them that the only acceptable dance at Mass is attendance.

Our headquarters for Liturgical Anonymous has a 24 hour hotline staffed by liturgical counselors. If you ever feel tempted to deviate from the norms give us a call and we will help you to overcome this temptation. Alcoholics can go cold turkey and avoid bars, but the liturgical abusers must learn to be attend the Mass with full, conscious and active prayerful participation without thinking how they would have done it different or how they would have redesigned the sanctuary.

Here are just some of the testimonial of successful members of Liturgical Anonymous:

I'm John [Last name withheld] the former clown altar server. I served at many Masses especially in the seventies. I saw no problem with it at the time and even served with priests also dresses as a clown. In Persona Bozo presented no theological difficulties for me. I thought I was just bringing joy to the people, I mean what could be wrong with that?

There is no disgrace in facing up to the fact that you have a liturgical abuse problem. So why not join now before some parishioners stage an intervention.

Remember "Friends don't let friends abuse liturgy."

2 Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur

There was a post on DCF recently that reminded me of all the millions of Latin phrases I found a couple of years back... I had my Dominican friend (that's a Dominican priest, not someone from the Dominican Republic... Just in case any of you thought any different... ADRIAN!!!!) tortured with funny quotes I'd find online, and would regularly sneak one into my email signature at work to see how long it would take my boss (or our American colleagues) to notice it and comment on it... I used to have them all on my computer somewhere (WHICH computer is the problem!), but have no idea where they're at now. But I can still remember some of my favourites...

Si hoc legere scis nimium eruditionis habes
(If you can read this, you're overeducated)

Si hoc signum legere potes, operis boni in rebus Latinus alacribus et fructuosis potiri potes!
(If you can read this sign, you can get a good job in the fast-paced, high-paying world of Latin!)

Vah! Denuone Latine loquebar? Me ineptum. Interdum modo elabitur
(Oh! Was I speaking Latin again? Silly me. Sometimes it just sort of slips out.)

Sola lingua bona est lingua mortua.
(The only good language is a dead language.)

Bene, cum Latine nescias, nolo manus meas in te maculare
(Well, if you don't understand plain Latin, I'm not going to dirty my hands on you)

Certe, toto, sentio nos in kansate non iam adesse )
(You know, Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore

Estne tibi forte magna feles fulva et planissima?
(Do you by chance happen to own a large, yellowish, very flat cat?)

Interdum feror cupidine partium magnarum europe vincendarum
(Sometimes I get this urge to conquer large parts of Europe)

Mater tua criceta fuit, et pater tuo redoluit bacarum sambucus
(Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries)

Utinam barbari spatium proprium tuum invadant!
(May barbarians invade your personal space!)

si in animis habeatis scidam latrinariam in domo mea ponere, vosmet rogate si possitis velocius currere quam saxum quod vadit cum celeritate nonaginta milia passuum per horam
(If you’re thinking of putting toilet paper on my house, ask yourself if you can outrun a ninety-mile-an-hour rock.)

audite: modo de colosseo rationem interfectorum recentissimam cognovi- Leonibus triginta duo Chrisitanis nihil clepsydra addita ad spatium mortis subitae
(Listen: I just got the latest score from the Colosseum- Lions 32, Christians 0, in a sudden-death overtime!)

Of course, most of these can be found in Henry Beard's books...


And speaking of Latin, I was just commenting to Éamonn last week, how after 3 years of studying Latin at school, all I can remember is one of the first sentences from our first year text book, which was "Cornelia est puella Romana quae in Italia habitat..."

And speaking of Éamonn... (Hehe! This is where I get my own back...) At his invite, myself and my friend (who some of you DCF-ers would know as Norwegianblue) went down to Dublin last Friday for the Stations of the Cross and the Solemn Liturgy of Good Friday in St Audoen's Church, which was, by all accounts, really powerful stuff. The music was incredible, with Allegri's Miserere being a highlight for me... (You can read more about it on his blog)

Anyway. I had asked Éamonn, when getting directions to St Audoen's, "Is it possible to avoid the city centre?", seeing as I had this great phobia of driving in Dublin City Centre... To which I was told "Yes, just about." Not realising that this was a very precise truth, and St Audoen's was, oh, a whole QUARTER OF A MILE from Dublin City Centre (!!!), I therefore decided to drive! In hindsight of course, it was a very good call, as I probably would have not gone, and therefore missed the whole thing (plus as an added bonus, I'm not quite as terrified of driving down there now... but not quite ready for O'Connell Street just yet!)... But I have now learned that if I am ever going to ask Éamonn anything ever again, to listen very carefully to his response and not to leave anything open for interpretation!!!

Wow. This has actually been a proper post after all... That wasn't my intention... Hang on and I'll go back and delete it!

2 Which airline...

A guy sitting at Bar at Brussels Airport noticed a very beautiful woman sitting next to him. He thought to himself, "Wow, she's so gorgeous she must be a flight attendant. But which airline does she work for?

Hoping to pick her up, he leaned towards her and uttered the Delta slogan:
"Love to fly and it shows?"

She gave him a blank, confused stare and he immediately thought to himself,
"Okay, she doesn't work for Delta".

A moment later, another slogan popped into his head. He leaned towards her
again, "Something special in the air?"

She gave him the same confused look.

He mentally kicked himself, and scratched Singapore Airlines off the list.

Next he tried the Thai Airways slogan: "Smooth as Silk."

This time the woman turned on him "What the h*ll do you want?"

The man smiled, then slumped back in his chair, and said,
"Ahhhhh, Easy Jet!"

1 Where do pets come from....

A newly discovered chapter in the Book of Genesis has provided the answer to "Where do pets come from?"

Adam said, "Lord, when I was in the garden, you walked with me every day. Now I do not see you anymore. I am lonesome here and it is difficult for me to remember how much you love me."

And God said, "No problem! I will create a companion for you that will be with you forever and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourself."

And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam. And it was a good animal.

And God was pleased. And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and he wagged his tail.

And Adam said, "Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal." And God said, "No problem. Because I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG."

And Dog lived with Adam and was a companion to him and loved him.

And Adam was comforted.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was content and wagged his tail.

After a while, it came to pass that Adam's guardian angel came to the Lord and said, "Lord, Adam has become filled with pride. He struts and preens like a peacock and he believes he is worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught him that he is loved, but perhaps too well."

And God said, "No problem! I will create for him a companion who will be with him forever and who will see him as he is. The companion will remind him of his limitations, so he will know that he is not always worthy of adoration."

And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam.

And Cat would not obey Adam.

And when Adam gazed into Cat's eyes, he was reminded that he was not the supreme being.

And Adam learned humility.

And God was pleased.

And Adam was greatly improved.

And Dog was happy.

And the cat didn't give a sh** one way or the other.

1 As we head towards Holy Week....

I'd like to share with you a poem by Steve Stockman that I've always found particularly striking at this time of year...

do not remind me

lord do not help me to remember
that which i have heard so often
because reminding me would soften the wonder.
instead help me see it afresh
like i have never seen it before
let me look at it for the first time
not forewarned about the next part
help me believe that he might not die
that the disciples might rescue him
that pilate might be strong
that the crowds might shout "crucify barabas".
let me hear the hammer come down
let me hear the sound of nail through flesh
let me hear the cry of pain
let me sense the distress
let me watch as they put the cross in the ground
let me look on his face contorted with pain
ugly with the agony and the torture
of suffocation one moment
and then the crippling ache of pushing himself up on those nails to breathe
let me see the sky go black
let me hear him cry
"father forgive them for they no not what they do"
"it is finished"
let me watch as they carry him off dead.
surely dead and without hope of recovery.
let me feel that despair, that loss, that tragedy.
let me weep and mourn
for hope that's murdered
and dreams that lie in a tomb.

then lord, without reminding me
without indication of the wonder
take me to that tomb
let me be surprised and confused
at the stone rolled away
let me be angry at the thought of his body stolen
let me go inside to look, to seek some clue
and then let me turn to see him
let me not believe it for a moment
and then give me the full hurricane force of belief
let me jump and shout and scream for joy
let my heart leap and my soul go running off to highest heaven
with a little glimpse of what blinds the saints
do not remind me but let me experience it for the first time
sin forgiven, redemption bought, freedom won
the amazing wonder of the gospel that calls me a child of god
no lord do not remind me
for that would be as dull as knowing the end of the movie
having read the last page of the book
show me for the first time and let it change my life

4 Bug in blog...

I got this in an email the other day, entitled "Bug in email..."
Thought I'd share!



I suppose its a bit like the Lionel Rich-Tea one that was going about a few years ago...



... or the "amazing picture of a sea horse"...

0 Lenten Reflections on EWTN

For all of you who have EWTN, check out the Lenten reflections that they will have on every Sunday throughout Lent. They've been produced by a friend of mine, who runs a media apostolate called St Brendan's Communications. These programmes promise to be very good, and this Sunday, the reflection will be given by Fr Owen Gorman, who is a fantastic priest. Check them out! The times for your area should be given on the EWTN website.

2 Especially for Pancake Tuesday....

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman were in a pub, talking about their sons.

"My son was born on St George's Day," commented the Englishman. "So we obviously decided to call him George."

"That's a real coincidence," remarked the Scot. "My son was born on St Andrew's Day, so obviously we decided to call him Andrew."

"That's incredible, what a coincidence," said the Irishman.
"Exactly the same thing happened with my son, Pancake."

1 To all my single friends...

... happy Glow Basking day..... where we bask in the glow of having not settled down with the wrong person!

Never listen to all those ridiculously happily married/dating/whatever people... It's sooooo overrated! Being single is cool! There's miiiiiiilllions of reasons why being single is sooooo much better... Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiilllllllllllllllllllllliiiiiiooons....

Uhh, if you can think of any, could you let me know?

2 There's no accounting for taste...

... It's hard to believe that this CD is actually for real....

As one reviewer put it, "I STILL am having trouble getting this out of my head, I'm considering therapy."




Though this just sums it up perfectly.... "Just wrong, just terribly wrong."

5 For Catholics Only!

This information is for Catholics only. It must not be divulged to non-Catholics.
The less they know about our rituals and code words, the better off they are.


AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.

BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending Mass.

CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync.

HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY.

HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range.

RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left.

INCENSE: Holy Smoke!

JONAH: The original "Jaws" story.

JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.

KYRIE ELEISON: The only Greek words most Catholics can recognize besides gyros & baklava.

MAGI: The most famous trio to attend a baby shower.

MANGER: Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn't covered by medical insurance. (The Bible's way of showing us that holiday travel has always been
rough.)

PEW: A medieval torture device still found in Catholic churches.

PROCESSION: The ceremonial formation at the beginning of Mass, consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late parishioners looking for seats.

RECESSIONAL: The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot.

RELICS: People who've gone to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel, and stand.

2 Firefox ad...

Thought it was funny! :)

3 New Catholic!

Just thought I'd share a couple of photos of the new Catholic in the family....



Tiring work, isn't it!!