There ya go... You learn something new every day...
3 Dorky Light-Weight Nerd...
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Labels:
misc
... That's me!!! But that's okay... Éamonn has his books and I get to keep my computer... ;-)
There ya go... You learn something new every day...
There ya go... You learn something new every day...
0 Why Computers Sometimes Crash
Labels:
humour
Why Computers Sometimes Crash! by Dr. Seuss.
I f a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and the bus is interrupted at a very last resort, and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash, and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash, and your data is corrupted cause the index doesn't hash, then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!
If the label on the cable on the table at your house, says the network is connected to the button on your mouse, but your packets want to tunnel to another protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall.
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss, so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse; then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang, 'cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang.
When the copy on your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk, and the macro code instructions is causing unnecessary risk, then you'll have to flash the memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM, and then quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your Mom!
I f a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and the bus is interrupted at a very last resort, and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash, and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash, and your data is corrupted cause the index doesn't hash, then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!
If the label on the cable on the table at your house, says the network is connected to the button on your mouse, but your packets want to tunnel to another protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall.
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss, so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse; then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang, 'cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang.
When the copy on your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk, and the macro code instructions is causing unnecessary risk, then you'll have to flash the memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM, and then quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your Mom!
3 Tech Support...
Labels:
humour
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes
to the accounting modules, limiting access to flower and
jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many
other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed
undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and HouseCleaning 2.6 simply
crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3
to fix these problems, but to no avail.
- Desperate
Dear Desperate,
Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package,
while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the
command: "C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME" and install Tears 6.2.
Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications:
Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, overuse can cause
Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, HappyHour 7.0
or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create
"Snoring Loudly" wave files. DO NOT install MotherInLaw 1.0
or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not
supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In
summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have
limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
Consider buying additional software to improve performance.
I personally recommend HotFood 3.0 and Lingerie 5.3.
- Tech Support
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes
to the accounting modules, limiting access to flower and
jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many
other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed
undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and HouseCleaning 2.6 simply
crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3
to fix these problems, but to no avail.
- Desperate
Dear Desperate,
Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package,
while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the
command: "C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME" and install Tears 6.2.
Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications:
Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, overuse can cause
Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, HappyHour 7.0
or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create
"Snoring Loudly" wave files. DO NOT install MotherInLaw 1.0
or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not
supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In
summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have
limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
Consider buying additional software to improve performance.
I personally recommend HotFood 3.0 and Lingerie 5.3.
- Tech Support
